catherine-morgan.com

FINDING EMPOWERMENT THROUGH ADVERSITY — by Catherine Morgan

When we are suffering it is very difficult, if not impossible, to see the light at the end of the tunnel. But, it is there. You will get through it. And, in time your wounds really will be healed.

Can something good come out of adversity? Often in the face of adversity, we are unable to see anything through our pain. The only thing we can think about, are questions. Why is this happening to me? How will I go on? How will I survive? These are all reasonable questions, and in the depth of your pain you will ask them, and more. But, there are no answers to these questions. Only after you realize this, will you be able to go on, and let go.

We can not turn away from our pain. It is very important that we feel all our feelings during these times of adversity and heartache. Denying our pain, or denying our feelings, will not benefit us in any way. In fact, it will only prolong our troubles. But, if we look at our situation, and face our problems head-on; we will triumph.

You may feel like you are losing the battle; but when you push through your battle, you come out on the other side the winner of your war. That is because you are empowered when you conquer life’s toughest battles. Only at these times of empowerment do we grow into the people we are meant to be. Think about that for a minute…Who would you be right now, if it wasn’t for the adversity you have been through in your life?

For me personally, I wish I had never had to go through many of the painful events of my life; loss, divorce, illness, betrayal, (just to name a few). But, I also know that I would not be who (or where) I am today, had I not. My past heartache, and my past pain, are what make me the compassionate person that I am today. And in retrospect, I don’t think I would want to be the kind of person, who knows no hardships. It’s because of these hardships that I appreciate every thing I have, even the little things that many people take for granted.

I can now see that my past adversity has truly been a blessing in my life. I don’t look forward to future adversity, however I know it will come. When it does come, I will have the knowledge of my past strength to help me overcome, and once again triumph.

My hope for everyone, is that they are able to one day look past their pain, to find their empowerment.

*This was cross-posted from a post I wrote back in January of 2007 for my first blog – Be The Change You Want To See In Yourself

Most of the time when we read about diet and weight-loss success stories, we hear how “easy” it was and how “anyone” can do it.   But the reality is, for most of us, it’s far from easy. In fact sometimes it’s so not easy that we just give up. Believe me, I get it. I can’t even count the number of times I’ve worked hard at eating healthy or exercising with little to no results.

Of course, I’m still inspired when I hear success stories of women like Valerie Bertinelli and Marie Osmond.  But what do we do when we are giving it all we got, and we are still not getting the results we’re looking for?

Should we throw in the towel?  Consider ourselves a failure?  Give up?

No, absolutely not.

Rather than looking at where we’ve gone wrong and just giving-up, it’s time to look at what we’ve done right.  That’s what I’ve been trying to do.  Instead of focusing on the fact that I haven’t lost any weight in the last six weeks (even though I’ve been eating healthy), I’m trying to focus on the positive…And you can do it too.

For me, it all started in May, when I decided to get serious about making healthy lifestyle changes.  Not just because I want to lose weight, but also because I know it will make a difference in my overall health and wellness.  I knew I wouldn’t be able to make all the changes I wanted to over night, but I did want to make the commitment to gradually eliminate the unhealthy foods from my diet, while incorporating more nutritious foods.

And now I find myself in the classic half-full or half-empty mark in my healthy eating plan.  I can choose to see my plan as half-empty, because I haven’t even lost one pound yet.   Or I can choose to see my plan as half-full, because I have had success in eating healthier foods and avoiding sugar.  In other words, I can choose to feel good about myself, or choose to feel like a failure.  It’s totally up to me.  And I’ve decided to try something new, and “choose” to feel good about myself and take a closer look at all the ways I’ve been successful.

Read more »

Well, I’m here to admit that I was unsuccessful in my Choose You commitment. I don’t really consider it a failure though, because I did meet most of my goals. I’m very happy that I am finally at the point where I am not craving sweets and other junk foods.

I didn’t lose any weight, but I was successful in maintaining my healthier eating habits. I wasn’t even tempted when my daughter brought back a plate full of deserts when we went out last week.

I have no plans of giving up. My next Choose You commitment will be to continue my healthy eating while also integrating regular exercise (specifically swimming) into my plan. Although I hope to lose some weight in conjunction with all of this, I’m not going to hold myself to any number on a scale. If I lose five pounds that will be a great bonus, but I know the most important thing is that I am choosing a healthier lifestyle for myself.

I recently wrote a post about choosing to see the positive when we are working hard at weight-loss and fitness goals, but not seeing many results.

I find myself in the classic half-full or half-empty mark in my healthy eating plan. I can choose to see my plan as half empty, because I haven’t even lost one pound yet. Or I can choose to see my plan as half-full, because I have had success in eating healthier foods and avoiding sugar. In other words, I can choose to feel good about myself or choose to feel like a failure. It’s totally up to me. And I’ve decided to try something new, “choose” to feel good about myself and take a closer look at all the ways I’ve been successful.

Although I haven’t lost any weight yet, I have had the strength and willpower to maintain healthy eating habits (and give-up sugar) for over six weeks. In my book, that’s success.

Anyway, that’s my story. I’ll let you know more about my new diet and fitness commitment next week.

What role does stress play in your life?   Sadly, these days, stress is not a rare event for most of us.  Personally, I’m not sure I can even remember the last time I had a totally stress-free day. Can you?

Stress isn’t always a bad thing, but when stress becomes chronic it can suppress the immune system, cause high blood pressure, and even increase the risk of stroke and heart attack.  For this reason, it’s extremely important to learn how to recognize the warning signs of unhealthy levels of stress.  We need to recognize when stress is becoming a problem, before it has a chance to cause harmful physical and mental complications.

Would you know if your stress level was becoming unhealthy?  Here are some of the symptoms you may experience if you’re suffering with chronic stress…

• Muscle tension
• Physical weakness
• Poor memory
• Sweaty hands
• Fear
• Confusion
• Inability to relax
• Constant worry
• Shortness of breath
• Palpitations
• Upset stomach
• Poor concentration

When these symptoms are accompanied by ongoing stress, it’s time to consult with a medical professional.

[I know there are many people that think it's a sign of weakness to admit that stress, anxiety, or depression is getting the better of them...But the truth is, it's a sign of strength.  It takes a courageous person to recognize when it's time to reach out for help.]

Read more »

Thanks for all of your wonderful and supportive comments on last week’s post. As promised, all of your comments were entered into a drawing for a Choose You stainless water bottle and lapel pin. Here is how it went down…

I had told my daughter (and official Choose You referee) that she could pick the winner. But when it was time to pick, my mother (and Choose You supporter) wanted to have a debate over who was more deserving of that honor. Ultimately, I let my daughter pick. Then, in order to appease my mother’s sense of competition, I had them both compete to see who could draw the better picture of the winner’s name. Only catch was, they didn’t want me to choose whose picture was better, they wanted all of you to decide (see poll at the end of this post).

And the winner is…

Congratulations Michele. You are the winner of the Choose You water bottle…I’ll be contacting you soon.

So now that we’ve taken care of business, let me tell you how I’ve been doing with my Choose You commitment.

It’s good and bad. The good…I haven’t eaten any of the foods I committed not to eat (that would be sugar and high fat snacks). The bad…I’ve been over compensating by eating more low-fat snacks (mostly pretzels). Since part of my commitment also involves losing at least five pounds, my current pretzel consumption isn’t going to be acceptable. But not to worry. I have a plan.

This is something that has worked for me in the past, so I’m going to do it again. Since I tend to be a “grazer” when it comes to eating snacks, I’m going to use small zip-lock bags to divide my snacks into smaller servings. I’ll go ahead and do it now so I can show you what I mean…and so I actually do it.

So now the bag of pretzels is filled with a bunch of smaller bags. I’m going to do the same thing with low-fat Cheez-Its. I know you can buy snacks already in smaller bags, but I always think it’s more expensive that way.

In addition to trying to be more conscientious about my snack consumption, I’m also going to start using the online calorie counter/food journal again (it really helps keep me more mindful of what I’m putting in my mouth).

And although I tend to be more of a do as I say, not as I do kind of girl…I’m going to try to take my own advice about willpower…

The more willpower you have the easier it will be, but perfection isn’t necessary.

Read more »

Be Careful of Diet Resolutions – Cross Posted at BlogHer Health & Wellness

Welcome to the dawn of a new decade.  I would be lying if I said I was sad to see the last one go.

It’s a new year, and once again we will all spend time analyzing our lives.  We will wonder if there is something we can change that could make our lives better in the coming year.

Read more »

This is a re-write from something I wrote back in January 2007…

Finding Empowerment Through Adversity

When we are suffering it is very difficult, if not impossible, to see the light at the end of the tunnel.  But it is there.  We will get through it.  And in time, our wounds really will be healed.

Can something good come out of adversity?  Often in the face of adversity, we are unable to see anything through our pain.  The only thing we can think about are questions.  Why is this happening to me?  How will I go on?  How will I survive?

Although we may want to, we should not turn away from our pain.  It is very important that we feel all of our feelings during these times of adversity and heartache.  Denying our pain, or denying our feelings, will not benefit us in any way.  In fact, it will likely prolong our troubles.  But if we look at our situation, and face our problems head-on…we will triumph.

We may sometimes feel like we are losing the battle; but when we push through the battle, we come out on the other side the winner of the war.  That’s because we are empowered when we conquer life’s toughest battles.  Only at these times of empowerment do we grow into the people we are meant to be.  Think about that for a minute.  Who would you be right now, if it wasn’t for the adversity you have been through in your life?

For me personally, I wish I had never had to go through many of the painful events of my life – loss, divorce, illness, betrayal, just to name a few.  But I also know that I would not be the woman I am today, had I not.  My past heartache and my past pain, are what make me the compassionate person that I am today.  And in retrospect, I don’t think I would want to be the kind of person who knows no hardships.  It is because of these hardships that I appreciate every thing I have, even the little things, the things that many people often take for granted.

I can now see that my past adversity, has truly been a blessing in my life.  And although I don’t look forward to future adversity, I do know it will come.  And when it does come, I will have the knowledge of my past strengths to help me overcome, and once again triumph.

My hope for everyone, is that they are able to one day look past their pain, to find their empowerment.

September was childhood cancer awareness month and I never had a chance to post on it. But I did want to at least mention Carolyn Rubenstein’s book Perseverance.

Can you imagine being in high school or college and suddenly learning you have cancer? You thought you had a lifetime ahead of you and the whole world at your feet, but suddenly you’re told… maybe not. How would you cope?

That’s the question the twenty young people in this book had to answer when they were diagnosed with childhood cancer. Perseverance shares life lessons learned through their stories and educates the reader on how to incorporate them into his/her life. It tells of their trials and tribulations, of their triumphs, and of the unique challenges that day-to-day life brings them. Perseverance also provides an intimate look at the lives and journeys of these young people and how their courage and strength have affected the lives of others.

Read more »

Is stress wearing you down? Are you worried about the bad economy? Your job? The mortgage? Your health? Your family? If so, you are not alone.

Life is always changing, and that can feel very stressful. But often, seemingly bad things will happen in our lives, that will actually turn out to be the catalysts to something positive. It’s very true that when one door closes another will open. Although it never feels so great when that one door closes. Recently I’ve had several doors close on me. But as hard as it’s been, I can already see that these things needed to happen to bring me closer to where I am meant to be.

There are three things we can do to help relieve the stress in our lives…

Continue reading the full post here.

“Go Confidently In The Direction Of Your Dreams” — Henry David Thoreau

With the pressures of daily life, do any of us really have time to think about our dreams? Do we even know what our dreams are? Kids know what their dreams are, just ask them…What do you want to be when you grow up? It is always such and easy answer for them. But once we do grow up, then what? Is is too late for us?

What if we never realized, that we might have been forgetting to follow our dreams? Worse than that, what if we thought we were following our dreams, but it turned out that we were living a nightmare? Then what? Is it too late? Do we get a second chance at our dreams?

When is it too late to follow your dreams? I would like to believe the answer to that question is never. I think our dreams are ever changing, and ever evolving, just as our lives are. I think that it’s o.k. not to be exactly sure what our dreams are, and it’s also o.k. if our dreams change from time to time. The only thing that is not o.k., is to give-up on our dreams. Because, once you give-up your dreams, you lose hope for your future.

But why then, do so many people give-up or deny their dreams? That is an easy one to answer…They give up because they are afraid, afraid of failure. Fear is what stops us from following our dreams. Fear is the darkness that casts a shadow over our light. And, fear is what we need to overcome if we want to reach for our dreams.

The most important thing to remember…Is to never let go of your hopes and dreams, even when you are not sure what they are. So, take some time to figure out what your greatest dreams are for your life, and then walk confidently towards them, without fear.

More on following your dreams…

• BlogHer Contributing Editor Marie Niles has recently done a post on How To Make Your Dreams Come True and Discovering Your Dream, Purpose or Passion.
• BlogHer Contributing Editor Mata wrote  10 Years From Now — Where is your happiness?

*cross-posted at Be The Change You Want To See In Yourself (from February 28, 2007)